Maybe a big ass night out is what i need

I was almost invited out tonight.

Now, many of you may be asking "How can someone almost be invited out? You are invited or you aren't" right? wrong.

Up until tonight I would have agreed with each and every one of you, but tonight I was almost invited out.

I was chatting with someone on cam tonight and throughout the conversation I was constantly complimenting her on her looks. Now I know you, my blog friends, haven't seen her, but this woman is a vision of beauty. She makes me think of the sheer beauty of a park in winter after the first snowfall. You just stare in awe at her.

At one point she told me that she will be going out with a few friends tomorrow night for some drinks.

And then she asked me what I was going to be doing tomorrow. When I responded that I would be working, she asked me what time I get off work. My damned luck has it that tomorrow I have to stay a couple of hours later, to help a friend.

It was an implied invitation, but one I couldn't accept, to my dismay. I honestly want to go be with her, talk to her, have a drink with her, stare into her eyes all night. But just my luck I decided to do a friend a favour.

Have I lost my chance, did I miss the crucial opportunity? God I hope not.

For those of you who read my blog with any sort of frequency (and who the hell knows why you do since I don't really have anything interesting to say, just a hell of a lot of ramblings) may have noticed that my emotional situation is like a yo-yo, especially with a certain someone.

The main reason I keep at it is simple. I have to. Ka, fate, destiny has shown me who I am meant to be with, and if it weren't for certain situations, I'm sure that we would already be together (wishful thinking? definitely, but I hold out hope). But I can't just turn around. I have to continue to show her how I feel. If she ever tells me "Stop, go away" I will. I have no desire to disrespect her wishes.

I know we can be happy.