This post will mean nothing to most of you out there, but to be honest, it's meant for one person specifically.
There are times when we screw up.
In my case it's often.
Why do we do this? I have no idea, but there are times when our actions and words are not governed by any rational thought process, but by a foolish desire for others to feel as badly as you do.
In my case I did this yesterday. I let my words hurt someone I care for. To be honest, hurting them was not my intent, but I knowingly said these stupid and foolish things.
Yes, I do admit that I have felt pain over things that have happened between she and I, but that was no reason to say the things I did. She at all times has been kind and civil to me, moreso than I ever deserved.
And now she's upset, and she's totally justified in being upset, angry, pissed off, and wanting to rip my head off constantly.
Add to this that I am definitely not feeling well, emotionally or physically, so when she tried to explain how she was feeling, I didn't understand a fucking thing.
All I can say now is I'm sorry. I've said it thousands of times before, and I'll probably say it thousands of times again.
I have been useless as a friend to understand your pain and hurt.
You have no need to justify or explain anything to me, ever. I don't deserve your explanations.
Only know this: You are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes upon. You are the sheer epitomy of kindness melded with pure beauty so as to create an amazingly wonderful woman.
You once sent me a song Beautiful Soul. As I write this I'm listening to that song, and I must tell you may be as beautiful as you are, so much so that when I saw you I was stunned, but it is definitely the beauty of your soul that makes you shine.
Believe me or don't believe me. That is your prerogative as an individual. Only know that I think this.
2 comments:
Thank you for that. Let's forget it and move on.
We are just good friends.
Post a Comment